WHO IS US?
We’ll let you in on a little secret… we’re actually humans. Shocking, we know. This page is where we step out of our UFOs and drop the cloaking field long enough to tell you who we are, why we’re here, and what fuels our mission. If you’re curious about the strange minds behind the glass and the galaxy jokes, you’ve landed in the right place.
Who we are
Gabby Scott, Product Development & Owner
WIZARD
Resident glass wizard at Glassified. She crafts bongs with the same passion she brings to late-night game sessions and big ideas. Bursting with creativity, curiosity, and chaotic good energy. Every piece she makes is a little weird, a little wonderful, and a lot her.
[REDACTED] aka “Minty”, Web Development and Ops
VETERAN
Founder of Fury Foundry. A die-hard devotee of the weird, the wild, and the wonderfully suspicious. Allergic to anything too serious. He works like a man possessed but he insists it’s just for fun. The man seems to values his privacy a bit too much.
WHAT WE DO
As part of the Fury Foundry network, this endeavor was built around Gabby’s gift for turning molten chaos into clean, beautiful glassware. She’s the creative force behind the torch—bringing handcrafted pieces to life for people who appreciate form, function, and a little bit of fun. High-quality glass for your high-quality ass. Obviously.
We produce as much as we can in-house, but we also partner with trusted suppliers to offer a few select drop-shipped pieces that match our energy and aesthetic. Everything you see here is either made by us, curated by us, or at the very least, approved by the group chat.
We're a small team with big ideas, scattered across different states and time zones, so we lean on each other (and sometimes a few robots) to keep things moving. Every order supports independent artists, handcrafted chaos, and the belief that even your smoke sesh deserves good design.
WHAT IS FURY FOUNDRY?
Fury Foundry is what happens when a group of strange but talented friends stop talking about their wildest ideas—and actually build them. It started with one person who had just enough technical know-how to bring a website to life. The rest? They brought absurdly marketable skills, unfiltered creativity, and a shared intolerance for taking things too seriously.
With zero funding, negative sleep, and a disturbing number of comma-less bank accounts, they launched a network of sites dedicated to making weird, brilliant, occasionally unhinged stuff—and selling it.
Fury Foundry is more than just a name. It’s a chaotic alliance. A crash site for outlandish plans. A digital playground where big personalities, dumb jokes, and conspiratorial designs find a home. If there's a will, there's a barely-functioning adult duct-taping it together behind the scenes.
We're not a company. We're a creative problem that learned how to register domains.
FAQs
Q: What exactly does Glassified sell?
We sell high-quality glassware (bongs, jars, grinders, trays, lighters, and more) designed with original, human-made artwork. Our products are for legal, tobacco-use only.
Q: Who makes your artwork and designs?
All artwork and designs are created by real human artists. We keep records of every commission and, when possible, link to our artists in the product descriptions.
Q: Do you use AI in your work?
A little bit—for copywriting and SEO support. It helps us clean up spelling, polish blog posts, and fine-tune descriptions. But every piece of art and design you see on a product is made by humans, for humans.
Q: Do you offer gift cards?
Yes! We have digital gift cards that can be used toward anything on the site. They’re delivered instantly by email and never expire.
Q: What payment methods do you accept?
Major credit cards and debit cards. (We don’t take crypto… yet.)
Q: Are your glass products durable?
Yes! We only stock pieces made from quality glass designed to withstand regular use. That said—treat them kindly. Glass is glass.
Q: How do I clean my glass?
We recommend isopropyl alcohol and coarse salt for most pieces. For accessories, a little warm soapy water usually does the trick.
Q: Who runs Glassified?
A very small team (two humans in two different states). We built this store as a way to bring our weirdest ideas to life, pay our artists fairly, and sell glassware with personality.
Q: Are you a serious company or just a meme?
Both. We love satire, conspiracy-theory vibes, and cosmic humor—but we also take our products, artists, and customers seriously.
Q: Do your products come with any “extras”?
Nope. We don’t sell or ship any controlled substances. Just the glass and accessories themselves.
Q: Where do you ship?
Currently within the U.S. (We don’t ship internationally yet, but we’re working on it.)
How is my order packaged?
Discreetly. We value your privacy, so packages don’t scream what’s inside.
Q: How long does shipping take?
Most orders ship within 2-4 weeks, some faster. You’ll receive tracking info as soon as it’s out the door. With custom orders, these things take time. It’ll be worth it!
Q: Do I need to be 21 to order?
Yes. Depending on your state laws, you must be 21+. We use an on-site age verification popup and checkout confirmations to keep things above board.
Q: Why do I have to click “I’m 21+”?
Because we’re selling glassware intended for adults. It’s not optional—this is part of staying compliant with platform rules and state regulations.
Q: Are you aliens?
Not officially. But our glass is definitely out of this world. 🚀
Q: Do the Illuminati approve?
Who knows… Ask them. Theoryfury.org
Q: Is this a front for something?
Yes! We only stock pieces made from quality glass designed to withstand regular use. That said—treat them kindly. Glass is glass.
Voluntary AI Disclosure & GLASSIFIED’s AI Policy
We’re a small team—just two people in two different states. Yes, we use AI to help us with copywriting (things like blogs, product descriptions, and the occasional social media post), but that’s mostly to cover search engine optimization or to rescue us from our own questionable spelling skills.
When it comes to what really matters, we believe in paying real people. We promise that 100% of the artwork and designs used on our products are created by humans, for humans. We keep records of all transactions with our artists and contractors, and whenever possible, we link to their work in our product descriptions.
At Glassified, AI is used almost entirely to fill in the intellectual gaps of the folks running this circus—nothing more, nothing less.